Let’s talk about the fact that for the first time maybe ever, I’m feeling real good about my resolutions. I’m a resolutions kind of gal. 100%. I love a list. I love a goal. I love self-evaluation. I do not love long walks on the beach. But I do love resolutions.
This year, I’m noticing, that a lot of my resolutions/thoughts on 2016 have almost nothing to do with elusive, emotion based goals or matters of the heart (i.e. “This year I want to work on me” or “Make friends” or “This year I want to finally know what it feels like to sit in silence with my own mind”) (*eyeroolllll*) (valid sometimes) (but also… eyerroooooolll!!!), but are actual things. That I will do. Things that I’ll do with my hands. Or my mind. Or my time. Which is exactly why I’m excited. To me, this feels indicative of the fact that I’m in a good place. Lately, when people are like “How are things?” I’m can truly respond with “Things are really good. Reallllly good. A hard yes.” Which is kind the best feeling. Tell me I’m wrong. I’m not. It’s the best.
Question: Why is it so hard/takes so much practice to really be able to own saying “Things are going really well!” when people ask me how I’m doing? It really did take me a few weeks/months of covering up or underplaying happiness or even searching for a minor thing to make big to be like “Look! My life is still hard in some ways too!!” Of course there are still things that are hard! Duh. But the majority of things are really good! So Imma say that! Am I alone in that? Is this a woman thing? A personality thing? A just not used to it thing? A false humility/afraid of sounding braggy thing? I don’t know. But I think it’s kind of bull shit and I’m working on getting rid of that thing.
Back to the rezzies. I’m so excited about them. And I feel like I’m doing pretty well on a few of them… others I haven’t even attempted yet. Which is fine!
More foods made from the ground
More foods from things that used to swim (less for health reasons and more because I love to eat fish).
Less Computer time.
Less buying of things. (Since we’re talking about this, is there anyone in the OC/LA area who likes being honest in a loving way and also has a loose understanding of my personal style goals who can help me go through my closet and do a big purge? Ideal: Frances Allen. She’s a great clothes-give-away-helper but Frances Allen lives in TX. Truth in love, people. Call me.)
Go on walks immediately from work. Because of 2 reasons:
1. It’s good for me.
2. I’m a much nicer person when I have a little bit of me time in the transition between work and home. Who knew!?
Get better at Graphic Design (this is less of a goal and more of something I’m looking forward to– which is a whole list in itself– bc I actually am taking a graphic design class this Spring)
Think before I speak. This one is kind of emotional, but I have guidelines that make it an actual practice and not just something to say. I want to start asking myself if what I’m about to say is either True or Necessary or Kind (perfect world: all three!) ? If not, I’m going to try and not say it. (Worried about the necessary one. I feel that a majority of my friendships are based on the unnecessary things that I say.)
Become a better photographer. I think I’ve mastered iPhone and am ready to step up to a big girl camera with actually thinking involved.
Write down something that makes me happy/grateful every weekday on my cool wall calendar. Today’s entry: Foot health. #grateful
Continue to watercolor
Send more mail. Note: I didn’t say “Write more letters.” Letters take time. If there is time for letters, so be it. But also, I want to just send more mail. Contents may or may not include: A page from my 24 Hour Woman Calendar that I’m ACTUALLY obsessed with, a envelope of glitter, an actual letter, a haiku, a lock of my hair. Send me your mailing information if interested in receiving mail.
It’s a good year. I can really feel it. I was sooooo done with 2014 when 2015 rolled around. And then 2015 was fully one of those years that you look back on and I feel like I lived 7 different lives with 10 different personalities, but I’m already pumped about 2016. Today, I had scrambled eggs with cheese and herby, limey, avocado sauce on the side and that’s just not something you would have done in 2015. But it just makes so much sense in 2016.