Pie Week: Magnolia Bakery

The following is an exact transcription from note’s taken live, on site, during pie consumption:

Magnolia Bakery: 
West Village

Hard to remain unbiased with magnolia bakery.
I’ve been here many times before.
And it’s in my favorite neighborhood of all time (New York City, speaking).

It is also sort of one of those notoriously popular NYC destination spot kind of bakeries, so I’m expecting great things.
But I’ve never had their pie.

Just walking with Jessie (co-conspirator in all things pie panned) down 6th and across Bleecker to get to the bakery puts me in a good mood. 
West Village, why’s you gottsta be so fine?

Magnolia is as charming as ever.
Note to self: must invent a cheesecake week so I can have an excuse to try their Chocolate Pudding Oreo Cheesecake. 
Looks amaaazeee.

We go with the Apple Crisp, Berry Crisp, and Chocolate Pudding Pie. 
Editors Note: In case you’re keeping track of the many feet pics I’ve taken in the last three months, yes, I have worn those sandals every day this summer. 

There isn’t really anywhere to sit in Magnolia, so we take Pie Week to the streets.
Specifically, the lovely park across the street will do.

Apple crisp
Not warm
Generous amount of crumble.
No, you know what? 
I wouldn’t really use the word “crumble” to describe what this is.
Crumble just doesn’t really do it justice.
It’s more like large boulders than crumble.
I’m thinking more Coliseum size ruins than crumble.
Apples are crunchy- this is good.
Heavy nutmeg and cinnamon- good.
Tastes like thanksgiving.
I want it to be fall.

Chocolate pudding pie
Is this supposed to be freezing? 
Because it is.
First Bite:
Um. Yes. Speechless.
But no. I have plenty to say.
This is amazing.
Everything I want in a pie.
Crust is compact but has dimensions.
Pudding is rich.
But, it’s definitely still pudding and not mousse.
I hate when pudding tries to be mousse.
It’s not trying to be anything it’s not.
I totally appreciate that.
Whipped cream tastes light and fresh.
The ice cream at Bubby’s and the Whipped cream at Magnolia could totally date.

Berry crisp
Not served hot.
Crisp is a bit bland.
Ok- this isn’t mixed berry.
Just blueberries.
I hate it.
This tastes like gasoline.
I want to spit it out.
But I’m a lady.
So, I just let it sit on my tongue as I let my jaw hang open and I make a whiny noises. 
I hate it.
And ONLY because Jessie talks me down from being unnecessarily cruel and giving them an anger induced F.
Her argument being that it is technically still edible, so it can’t qualify for an F. 

This is a tough grade to give. 
We have two extremes here. 
The cream of the crop in pudding pies and the world’s worst blueberry pie ever to exist. 
Ultimately, I love Magnolia, but I think pie may not be their selling point. 
Stick to their cupcakes. 
Or their seemingly delectable cheesecakes. 
Ultimately, my experience was best described as “Nice.”

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